Edward Nigma (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
riddlemethis) wrote2012-01-03 01:13 am
riddlemethis) wrote2012-01-03 01:13 am
Well, so much for that
It turns out that life: it sucks.
I'm done. I'm going to move.
Turns out, no one gives a crap about me. It turns out that people that you think are sweet are liars. Liars that hurt you. That treat you like an object, they use you up and leave you alone. They let you wander in the dark without any memories to be picked up by your worst enemy. This was... terrible.
I hate my life. I hate everything.
And I'm leaving this journal. There's no need to help undesirable people contact me.
I'm done.
I'm done. I'm going to move.
Turns out, no one gives a crap about me. It turns out that people that you think are sweet are liars. Liars that hurt you. That treat you like an object, they use you up and leave you alone. They let you wander in the dark without any memories to be picked up by your worst enemy. This was... terrible.
I hate my life. I hate everything.
And I'm leaving this journal. There's no need to help undesirable people contact me.
I'm done.
Re: Don't Leave
Do you really think I would even think about raping you?
No, don't answer that. You obviously do.
I'm not a decent person. I've never claimed to be. But I can be. I want to be. I want...
You're not just another person. You'll never be just another person to me. You're beautiful and brilliant and the only person I've ever really... God, Edward, I don't WANT to stalk you. I just want to find a way to make you like me again. I don't want to treat you like an object. I want to treat you like someone I love.
...Don't say you hate me. Please, stop it. I can't stand it.
Re: Don't Leave
Jonny... Are you for real? You claim to love me, but... Your response to me being hurt and traumatize by you is to stalk me? All you care about is what you want and what you need, not about me at all. What if I need space? What if being around you hurts me? You'd prolong that pain for me? Honestly, its pretty obvious you don't care about me.
So stop lying to me. Stop pretending like this is about me. You're just pissed off that you were rejected. Its just sad.
Re: Don't Leave
I never thought of it that way. I guess... I... You're right. The doctors are right. I'm just a sociopath. Edward...
I'll leave you alone. You won't have to worry about seeing me.
...
If I give you space, if I leave you alone for a while... Can I see you again? I'll give you time, and space. And... I could use the time, too. To think. Would that be alright? Please, Eddie.
Re: Don't Leave
Maybe. If I can forgive you when I'm by myself, then... God, I don't know. I wasn't as mad at you before today. But the way you've spoken to me since I decided to leave... I may never forgive you. I had no idea you were this horrible of a person.
I'll see you later. Maybe. For now...
Don't count on it.
Re: Don't Leave
I'm sorry. I never meant to treat you badly. I never meant for any of this to happen...
I know it doesn't mean anything to you now, but... I love you. I really love you.
Goodbye, Eddie. I hope I'll see you again.
Re: Don't Leave
I wish that meant something. God you have no idea how much I wish that.
Good bye, Jonathan.